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S1E17 – Learn English with Crazy Stories – I Made Love to a Car

Episode Notes

Learn English with Crazy Stories

When Gary was a child, his parents couldn’t afford a car. So they used to imagine driving a car down the street. Gary was in love with that car. If only it was real…

…Now an adult, Gary finally finds the car of his dreams.

*May contain adult content.

I grew up in a poor family. We didn’t have any cars. We used to have to walk everywhere. I would walk to school, to the supermarket, everywhere. As a family we used to walk as if we were in a car. My parents walking together in front and my sister and I walking directly behind them. We would pretend to go to the garage to put petrol in our ‘car’; my father would hold the petrol pump nozzle and my mother would make the pump noises. Of course, my father wasn’t holding a real nozzle; he was holding a carrot, which we shared afterwards.
Our imaginary car wasn’t a Ferrari or Mercedes or anything fancy. It was a regular family size car. I always imagined it to be green.
I remember our best Christmas ever, we managed to save some money to buy a car air freshener. The small was called Spring Day Mint. When we walked down the street pretending to be a car, my mother would hold the air freshener. I enjoyed the smell, although it did smell the same as the bathroom after it had been cleaned with cleaning product.
So that is where I came from. I was always jealous of other people’s cars. I wished that one day I could by my own car.
15 years later I managed to finish high school and get a decent job. In fact, it is my dream job. I wash cars all day. I get to touch those amazing bodies every day. I have two sponges, but sometimes, I also use my body as a sponge. I wet my clothes and then rub myself along the car to clean it and experience a deep connection with the beast. I have been fired 5 times by other garages. But, finally, I have a boss who understands. Well, I actually think he doesn’t care as long as we make money.
It was one spring day, when everything changed. I was waiting for my next customer to bring their car when there I saw it. A typical family sized car and it was green. They also wanted it to be washed. This was it! That imaginary car from my childhood was real! It was mine for 20 minutes. All mine!
I started to wash it and all the memories came back to me. Nobody was watching, so I decided to open the door. Then a smell hit me. It smelled of that same Spring Day Mint smell. I knew then that the car wanted me! I started to breathe heavily. I started to lick all the seats in the car. I licked all the seats, except for one suspicious dirty mark in the back seat. I was horny.
Over the next 15 minutes I slowly explored the car and had sex with it. The gearstick was as good and pleasurable as I imagined, although I did accidently put the car into reverse a few times. I then got out of the car and was ready to play with the exhaust when the owner came back.
He was a little suspicious why the door was open. I said that I had given the inside of the car a free clean. He was very happy and even praised me for giving the seats a nice shine.
As the car drove off I noticed smoke coming from the exhaust. I thought to myself “typical! Smoking after sex”. But it was great sex!
I’ve never seen that car again. Sometimes, I think whether it really happened or if I had inhaled too many cleaning products in my job. Maybe that green car will come back one day.

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